Why me?

it's already obvious that I expressed everything here in my blog and yet there is no response from you... Nothing solid, nothing concrete. I just don't know why am I still thinking of you tho it is really tearing me apart deep inside. Sorry, PMS coming soon in "cinema". Am really hope one day I could really stop thinking and telling myself that this is just a lie, manda. But I couldn't. Whenever I try to tell myself that is is just a lie, there's a soft whisper saying that, "no, it's real babe". Why is it so miserable? Why am I is the only should wait but not you? It is worth for me to do so? Why wouldn't you reply me?



Sometimes I really wonder, really really wonder that did I ever crossed your mind just once through out the whole duration that we have been so....so stranger... I don't know which word should I use to describe this situation.



I do even think that how nice would it be without you approaching me early in the morning and how would it be like without you coming to my life. I really wanna know. I mean, how can you be so mean that you can say something so convincing and real to me then you left without a trace. Why would you wanna do something like that to someone? You might not know that you have become someone that mean so much to me. Even a game have a "game over" but you went missing just like that.

I remember one of my friend post his status something like "if thing goes smoothly, something is wrong". So... Maybe something is wrong. Friends told me this is just a prank. I remember how I talk to your cousin and tell him not to prank me, you and him just make thing look so real. Skype and everything, so solid. Until you flew.... Everything starts to change. Now, everything seems like a game without an end.

I'm like "what have I done to you until you have to set a game like this for me?". I told my friends that I had enough of waiting. The biggest lie I ever made. I'm not over you yet. Just to make them stop worrying about me. Yes, this is me. Always keep 'em in my heart till I told them...


Now, smile is the only thing I can do..... I miss you, boo....